a blurred horizon

Today I’m sitting in the living room of my new home, drinking a warm cup ofcoffee feeling very inspired.  More inspired than I have felt in a long time.

After a year of renting a place in the city, I took the plunge and purchased an apartment by the waterfront.  This is something that I’ve wanted since I was a little girl.  I can actually remember a sassy 7 year old girl, throwing a tantrum in the back seat of her fathers car, begging him to take the long way home so that she can catch a glimpse of the lakeshore along the way. Now, a few decades later, here I sit with my patio door wide open admiring the beautiful scenery that I have loved my entire life, and the crisp spring breeze is making me feel refreshed and alive once again.  The lake is covered by a mist that blurs the horizon of where the lake ends and the sky begins.  As I sip my warm cup of morning coffee, I think to myself, ‘such is life!’

After months on this journey of trying to live a more inspired life, I’ve finally decided to embrace with open arms all that life was bringing to me.  Sometimes we try desperately to cling to what we know and what is familiar, but in the end life always knows better.  When you embark on this journey and open your heart to it, life brings you many blessings and clues as to what it is you should be moving towards.  But it also brings you many challenges and lessons.  These challenges and lessons force you to leave behind some of the things in your life that are not serving your purpose.  Maybe even things that you need to change about your self. This is seldom an easy thing to do but it is necessary if you want to see where your journey is taking you. 

 In short, much like the blurred horizon, you can’t really see ahead how and where one chapter of your life ends and the other begins. The journey will only reveal the details to you in small, unmarked doses.  The only thing that you can count on is that if you embrace the journey, and all of good bad and the ugly that comes with it, you will find your purpose. 

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About the writer

So yes, you've guessed it...I am in the process of getting divorced. Now surely I've had many challenges along the way, but I can honestly say that it has truly been the most eye opening experience of my life. Although it's never what you plan or hope for and it can be truly devastating when you realize it's happening, but it can also have a silver lining if you look for it...once you get through the guilt, anger, self-loathing, several pints of Haagen Dazs and a crate or two of wine of course. My divorce not only got me out of a very unhealthy relationship, but it also opened the door for me to reshape my entire life. So after a year of loafing, I am getting my ass off my couch and into gear to transform everything that I know has not been doing me any justice in my life. I went from trying to be the perfect daughter to trying to be the perfect wife, constantly accepting that which was imposed on me and living my life on auto pilot. Well, all that is about to change. 2012 is finally over and the new year is here, and this will be the year that I change my life and make it what I want it to be. This blog will document my experiences and hopefully help other men and women in the same boat to find some sort of inspiration. I would also like to hear from those of you who have some tips, advice or inspiring stories of your own to share. For many of us, just knowing that there are others who have lived to tell their stories with somewhat of a happy ending, is inspiration enough. Happy New Year!!!

3 comments

  1. I really enjoyed reading this. You are an amazing writer and really captured my attention. Enjoy your new place and best of luck with everything 🙂

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