Do you ever feel like for every two steps forward you take ten steps back!?!?!? Well that’s been me the last few months. And getting there was the easy part! The hard part was trying to figure out how I got there! I’ve spent weeks in meditation and I have finally come to realize that I have been wasting all of my time and energy on things that have been depleting me and my own love of self. The scary part is that it was as easy as falling back into all my old habits and patterns that got me into hot water in the first place.
Life is a journey and it will take us wherever we want it to, so long as our thoughts and emotions are in alignment with what it is we truly want. Lately, all of my thoughts and emotions have been focused on what I don’t want. Having been stressed and bogged down with work and dealing relationship issues of all kinds, my focus has been on everything that has not been working. What’s worse is that I have invested so much time and energy into what’s not working that I have inevitably put myself in mental state of lack. This is a big no-no when it comes to the law of attraction. This law requires us to take a step back from what we are allowing to take over our life, and to get back in touch with ourselves. And sometimes when what we want doesn’t seem to be working for us, we need to shift focus on things that are. That’s not to say that we need to eliminate what ever it is from our life, but we do need to stop worrying about fixing it. Worrying is a powerful form of manifestation because there is so much emotion attached to it. But all you end up doing is manifesting more worry.
So after weeks of being consumed by work and a number of relationship issues, I have decided to put my money where my mouth is. I have cashed in all my travel points and now I am writing to you from a beach in Bali. Today is day one my solo journey to the opposite corner of the earth and the plan while I am here for the next twelve days is simple – to spend some quality time alone with me and to do something that I have always wanted to do for myself. No itinerary, no schedules, no distractions. My only plan is to wake up every morning and say to myself “self, what do you want to do most today?”. And believe me when I say this is a big step for the girl who in middle school, came home crying because she didn’t want to go camping with her class because she was afraid to be without her family for a week! So today as I am writing this post, the one thing that I am most grateful for aside from some banked air miles, is courage.